Y'ALL I HAVE EXACTLY ONE WEEK TILL I LEAVE FOR YOUTH BECOMING LEADERS IN WILMORE, KENTUCKY!!! Someone wanna pinch me?!
I can't tell you how excited I am. Or how nervous. I can't wait for my time in Kentucky, but I also need to be really real here. I am also very, very afraid.
There are so many unknowns. So many things I don't know yet and can't control (and let me tell you, this girl likes being in control!). And suddenly, that's all starting to hit me. I've already started monitoring the forecast for every city we'll stop in for our flight (anyone else hate turbulence?), and I've began to recognize the reality that I will be in an entirely different state from my family and twin sister for two full weeks. It's kinda a big deal for me. Also, I haven't even begun to pack, and that is task that is daunting all on its own!
But as I sit here this Sunday morning and think about each of these fears and concerns, I can't help but be drawn into the Lord's peace. It's like He's tapping me on the shoulder gently and drawing me into His arms, inviting me to step out into the storm with Him, with His grace and power.
I saw this character of God clearly last night as I struggled to sleep through at least six hours straight of thunderstorms in our area. I already hate thunderstorms, and they never fail to wake me up and make me as terrified as a five-year-old. No joke: I seriously still go sleep on the floor of my parents' bedroom because I get so scared! So last night when the thunder and lightning blew in, my instant reaction was fear and dread. I have received lots of helpful and encouraging advice on coping strategies to stop the panicky feelings I get during bad weather, but it often times doesn't help much because I simply can't calm down. However, last night was kind of different. For the first time since I can remember, I actually felt relatively calm during the storms. The occasional loud clap of thunder would still startle me, but my physical reaction to my anxiety wasn't nearly as strong as it normally is, and I can only attribute that to the work of the Holy Spirit.
I still don't like thunderstorms, and I still don't look forward to having to face any more fears...but I can do so knowing my God goes with me. In fact, I believe He is calling me out of my fears. Last night, He was having me face my fears. Yes, it was a little scary at times, but He was faithful, so faithful. I stand here to say that I safely lived through that storm like it was no big deal.
Jesus said: "I came that they may have life, and have it more abundantly." An abundant life meaning full of joy and less full of stress and anxiety. When I think about this, it reminds me that His love came for me to live my life to the full, not to cower at every dangerous possibility. I think that when we accept Jesus's invitation to face our fears, we are truly stepping out of our anxiety and into love. And that is what an abundant life looks like. That is what Jesus is talking about.
So as I venture into this exciting, somewhat scary season of unknowns and adventures, I pray that I may trust the Lord and accept His invitation into whatever He has for me. And I pray for all of us to continue courageously taking His hand and taking the leap of faith out of fear and into love and abundant life. We have a good God who loves us, cares for us, and will never let us down. Will you choose to trust Him?
Also, if you have any fears that I can be praying for you in facing, please don't hesitate to contact me. I would be honored to pray for you as we journey out of fear and into the love of Jesus Christ.
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